Slogging Through

The last few days, with the exception of my backyard reverie, haven't been a whole lot of fun. Saturday was a struggle to remain upright, and by the time I went to bed I felt physically drained from doing battle with my own brain all day. I think I had a near panic attack too, I felt a tightness in my chest and I thought I was going to pass out when I closed my eyes to wash my hair in the shower. Yesterday I felt physically beaten again until around dinner time. Next Saturday will mark 3 weeks since I started the full dosage of my meds, if I don't feel consistently better by then I think a change may be in order.

Today I had to get fingerprinted for my new job, they're doing an extensive background check. I guess next time I kill someone I'm going to have to wear gloves. The cliche about government agencies being huge bureaucracies is no myth, so far I've had to submit seventeen forms since I was offered this job. Sheezus. And the lady who took my fingerprints told me I haven't seen anything yet! I had to be in downtown Dallas at 10 this morning, and since that is close to the time I have been dragging my ass out of bed recently, I had to get up a little earlier than usual. It was kind of weird to be up so early, but I guess I better start getting used to it again (and it will need to be even earlier than this morning). It was actually kind of nice to have to be somewhere for a change. It took me an hour to travel the 35 miles to downtown. Bad traffic is something I'm also going to have to get used to. I seem to do OK with it though if I know it's going to be bad, it's when it's unexpected that I get hacked.