Damn Browser!

Today something happened that completely mortified me. However, I do have to admit that it's also pretty damn funny.

When you have statcounter tracking your blog, you will no doubt notice that from time to time you get some pretty weird searches that end up leading to your blog. For example, one of my recent favorites was 'had you a clown for breakfast'. To which I have to say, WTF?! I don't think I want to meet the person who was looking to have him a clown for breakfast. My blog comes up #1 on a search for this phrase on google. You can get some pretty weird shit popping up when the search engine combs a full month's worth of posts at one time.

Holli and I like to occasionally out-weird each other with the search phrases that lead to our blogs. Today Holli sent me one that tapped her blog, which happened to be (I am substituting zeros for O's in the hopes of thwarting any further attempts to find this phrase): 'Cannibalized b00bs'! I will leave it to Holli to explain how her blog is #2 for this search (actually it's completely innocent)! Well, when I saw this I had to click on the link because I had to see how these two words ended up on Holli's blog. And no, they don't appear consecutively!

I have recently started using Avant browser, and for the most part I like it. However, there is one annoying feature that I have discovered. When you do a search, even on a website that you type in yourself and even if the phrase was from a link, the phrase you searched will show up in this search box on the upper right hand side of the browser, and it will stay there until you delete it or search for something else.

So this morning after I clicked on the 'Cannibalized b00bs' link, this wonderful phrase popped into that search box and stayed there. After I was done checking my email, I asked my mother if she wanted to check her email before I turned off the computer. She said yes, so I pulled up the AOL web site and let her sit down to check her email. I came over to look and make sure that the page was loading OK, and then to my horror I saw that the phrase 'Cannibalized b00bs' was just sitting there in that search box for all the world to see. I panicked. The freaking AOL site was taking forever to load, so basically there was a blank white browser screen with a toolbar at the top that had the phrase 'Cannibalized b00bs' in it. Did she see it? I don't know. I almost can't see how she couldn't have. I wasn't sure whether to mention it so I could explain the innocent origin, or to just stay silent. I chose the latter. Mom didn't say anything. I'm not sure if I made matters worse when she stepped out for a second and I deleted the phrase before she came back. Would that draw more attention?

So, basically, there may be a good chance that my mother thinks that I was searching on the internet for 'Cannibalized b00bs'. Holli thinks that I should bring it up so I can explain it, but I'm kind of scared to. 'Cannibalized b00bs' aren't something I regularly talk to my mother about. I bet Mom will be plenty happy to get on that plane tomorrow to get away from her batshit son! GAH!